“What Do You MeAN YOU PANICKED? WE’VE BEEN DATING FOR SEVEN MONTHS”

Can I propose to you a new Harry Potter? One raised by Sirius and Remus, one who shared his father’s Indian heritage, who wears leather jackets and denim over hoodies, who shops second hand and uses magic or just old fashioned dyes, paints and a needle to make them new again, who has long curly hair and pins it up with his wand like is godfather, who can do magic without his wand with Hermione’s help long before deathly hallows, who bonds with Hermione over the sheer amount of hair care products they have weighing down their luggage, who makes friendship braclets with Luna and they start a band together as they bond over punk shit. One who isn’t afraid of Draco but instead spends a lot of time trying to help him. Whose little brother Teddy was born through a surrogate in the order, and every time Harry comes home on holiday he brings the kid some new punk CD or candy or some prank stuff from the weasley’s joke shop. Who probably gave himself a lightening bolt stick and poke after his scar faded to go along with the one of the two deer he gave himself in second year. He probably also gave Ron a stick and poke too, and a few other members of gryffindor tower. Neville probably has a phoebe buffay tattoo from that time.

Pansy: Okay, I think I know how I can find out whether Hermione likes me or not. We’re going to a New Year’s Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! You know? But if she says “Pansy, what the hell are you doing?”, I can say “It wasn’t me, it was New Years!”

Draco: Well, that’s a lot better than Harry trying to kiss me back in Hogwarts, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick

Harry: ...

Harry: It was a dry day

Tumblr Code.

Rowena Ravenclaw: Wait, Salazar, how come you ended up with the shittiest common room? We dished out the money to make them equally AND you’re the richest sod out of all of us

Salazar Slytherin: [thinks back to installing a giantass slide into the Chamber of Secrets and putting a statue of himself in it]

Salazar Slytherin: Uhhhhh… taxes [sweats heavily]

This footage of Elmo after messing up a take on Sesame Street is peak relatable

the older i get the more i realize what it meant for lily and james potter to die at 21. when you’re 11 and you’re reading the books, watching the films, 21 feels ancient. it did to me. even the actors they picked looked like they were in their thirties, because actual 21 year olds standing next to harry in the mirror would have been an excruciating sight i think. actual 21 year olds lined up in the photo sirius shows harry would have been horrible to see. they weren’t adults. i look at 21 year olds now and most of them are still teenagers. and i’m so sad because you know harry turns 21 and then 22 and then 28 and 29 and realizes how terribly young his parents were, how brave they were, how exceptional they were, GOD I’M SAD IM GETTING A BEER

Harry: Draco.

Harry: why is the outside of the flat painted in rainbow colours

Harry: Other people live here too

Draco: It’s pride month Harry! Gotta get in the spirit!

Harry: Does it come off?

Draco:…

Draco: It’s 20gayteen it’s pride year Harry! It doesn’t need to come off

Harry: That’s a no then

Reblog if you write fic and people can inbox you random-ass questions about your stories, itemized number lists be damned.

do you ever look at someone and think ‘man, what a work of art’